Wednesday, August 13, 2008

The Garage Sale

I could never figure out why people advertise for a garage sale, and then you get there, and the sale is in the yard. Now we just had a garage sale and I still can't figure it out. We got the stuff from Aunt T moving. on the day of the garage sale, the Campbells came over to help. We each took turns as the cashier. I don't know why, but handling the money was a popular job. Maybe it was just fun to watch all the moolah pile up. We probably could have doubled our profits if there weren't so many things that appealed to us. When we were preparing the stuff for the garage sale, a lot of this was going on:
Uncle Bryan (the pricer):Wow, look at this Mariners baseball.
Seth: Wow. That's mine now.
Uncle Bryan: Check out this collection of baseball cards.
Ryan: Thank you.
Me: Hmm. What price for these brand new Nike Airs?
Emily: Oh, Joy!
The night before the garage sale, Ryan and I decided to "camp out " in the front yard to test out the one man tent (oops) that was going to be for sale the next morning. I think that Dad "accidentally" forgot to turn off the sprinklers that night.
The next morning, we put on the garage sale, and Miri set up a little Sprite stand in the front of the driveway, and everything went as planned, except for the pop stand, as there were too many generous donations to the hard working staff.
At one point, Micheal asked a young mother "Where is your boyfriend?"
"He's in the car," she replied. "I like 'em young."
In the car sat a little boy, no older than 3.
Well, there's nothing more to say.
THE END


Sunday, May 25, 2008

Funny Alliterations

Here are some meaningless, amusing alliterations that I thought up today:

  • Fat Frank, fretting Fred, philosopher Filmore, and fitful Fern formed a ferocious, friendly phantom ferret farm.
  • Dylan dutifully died dancing on a dead dog in the dark.
  • Emily encountered edible ents entering entland.
  • Fred found a fireball flaming on his forehead.
  • The powerfully potent poison will protect poor Patrick the predictably pathetic pilfering postman.
  • Willful Willie wandered with wonderfully whining Winifred.
  • Horrible Harry hatefully hid Hattie's happily holy hot pad.
  • Andy ate Adams aidfully apple-eating adder.
  • Melvin's muscular, marauding moose melted Max's mind.
  • Yithlewithle the young yak yelled a youthful yodel.
  • Sorry Sam struggled safely with Sally the singing shark.
  • Carnivorous Katie Craftily killed Kathy the Katydid.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Ahhhh, spring at last! Part II

This paragraph will only be explaining the technical difficulties with the keyboard. If you would like to see the actual continuation of my previous post, by all means, start on the second paragraph. The reason that I didn't write any more on my earlier post was because the b,n, and m keys were not working, and it took me about a half an hour to write the last three sentences. I was cutting and pasting letters all over the place. Oh, and by the way, for those of you who were wondering, I wrote the last sentence without cutting and pasting. And now for the continuation of yesterday's post(and hopefully a few pictures):

Ahhh, spring! The birds are singing! The wasps are stinging!(don't ask) Last Saturday, after a delicious pancake dinner, Seth and I looked out the window and decided that it was the perfect day for jumping on the trampoline. Earlier that day, my dad had moved the trampoline to another spot on the lawn, and little did we know, one of the legs of the trampoline had broken off in the process. We noticed this at once, right after it collapsed under our feet. My mom immediately herded Seth and me into the van, drove us to Wal-mart and grabbed a new trampoline, drove us home, and said "Oh, and by the way you're staying home from school on Monday to put the new trampoline together." That scared both of us to death, since dad was going on a business trip to Indianapolis, and we would have to assemble the trampoline singlehandedly! Two days later, on Monday morning, we finally put the last spring on the trampoline I had the feeling that it had been way to easy. I was right, too. Only a few seconds later, two sides of the trampoline curved up about five feet. This, we thought, was not typical trampoline behavior. And then, all of a sudden, Seth had the most brilliant idea! We would both lie down on either end of the trampoline until it was "warped" into a normal shape. I promptly hopped onto one end, and Seth hopped onto the other. After about half an hour, I said thoughtfully"We should probably get off and check to see if it's "warped" into the right shape yet." we got off, and to my delightful surprise, the it was rising to its former shape more slowly than before! Seth, however was not satisfied with a burrito, however slowly it got to that shape. I agreed grudgingly, and went inside to tell Mom that our brand new trampoline thought that it had a future as an over-sized potato chip. "Well, " she said. "did you put the legs on first?" "Ummm," I said as I glanced out of the window at the gigantic black pringle that I was supposed to turn into a trampoline. "Well, not exactly. " " Then go out and take apart the whole thing!" was her reply. " You have to start trusting the people who made the instruction manual!" Oops. From that point on, there is nothing worth putting in this post besides the fact that I finished the trampoline.(And neglected to read the instructions AGAIN! We now have to be satisfied with a net around the trampoline that you can slide under.)

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Ahhhh, spring at last! Part I

Spring is here at last! After a five month winter in Moscow, I groan at the sight of a snowflake. I'm not exaggerating about the five month thing. It has been snowing from the November of '07 to the April of '08! There were eight snow days for the Moscow schools. Now, instead of about a zillion days of school between now and summer, there are no days off, plus there are ten more minutes of school added to our daily schedule. I would have written a lot more on this subject but I have been having technical difficulties with both the keyboard and the picture downloading program for blogger. More on this next time. Good ye for ow!

Sunday, March 30, 2008

After the tournament, I feel very strongly about the Cougs

GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS!GO COUGS!GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS!GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS!GO COUGS!GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS!GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS! GO COUGS!GO COUGS!

Monday, March 17, 2008

>:-(Absolute Outrage!)-:<

Today, I learned something absolutely OUTRAGEOUS! The heading for chapter nine, lesson three in my SIXTH GRADE MATH BOOK read: Solving Subtraction Problems. EXCUSE ME, BUT I'M NOT TWO YEARS OLD, MISTER MATH BOOK WRITER!!!!!! It seems to me that every thing you "learn" to do in math involves problems that, instead of being turned into an algebraic equation that only a rocket scientist could interpret, could be broken down to a simple addition, subtraction, multiplication problem that a third grader could solve! I mean, it seems to me that every thing from the second semester of sixth grade on is teaching you to take a simple addition, subtraction, multiplication, or division equation, and building it up to a mind boggling five page algebra problem. Then, you learn how to break those down to the simple problem that it was all those days ago when you started to work on the problem!

Bye bye for now!
- Jared